In public restrooms, I typically got to attempt a number of stalls before I will notice a rest room seat that isn’t spattered with pee. I don't fancy this. whereas I understand pee on the rest room seat isn't a world hunger-level downside, it's associate needless one to possess to endure with any quantity of regularity, therefore I feel entitled to complain concerning it. Pee on the seat is gross and indecorous and ladies? it's to a lower place North American country. however my mamma told Maine I shouldn’t complain concerning one thing unless i used to be ready to supply an answer, therefore that’s what I’m doing.
Here’s a thought: Why don’t we tend to all simply move and sit down on public toilets? Wild plan, huh? (I’m reprehension you, squatters!)
I sympathize with the debilitating anxiety of getting one’s thighs and partial butt-cheeks bit an area that was recently touched by a stranger’s thighs and half her butt-cheeks. I perceive however icky that's. no one loves swapping dead skin cells with strangers, and particularly not butt skin cells.
I additionally deeply perceive the incapacitating concern of doubtless sitting in stranger-pee. there's undoubtedly a special corner in hell reserved for baby teasers and puppy kickers wherever they need to take a seat down in a very puddle of somebody else’s excretory product over and yet again for all eternity.
So if you’re a squatter, I get it. i actually do.
But if you’re squat-peeing in a shot to avoid perhaps smearing your thighs within the dead skin cells of strangers, you're not a part of the solution; you're, in fact, the matter. Not “part of” the matter. however the matter.
YOU are wrecking piss sitting down for everybody else. as a result of you, my friend, area unit the one WHO is urination everywhere the seat.
The difficult issue concerning squatting is that we ladies can’t very management wherever our pee goes, that is quite the explanation bathroom seats were fictitious within the initial place. A woman’s anatomy is such, in squat position, our pee is just about absolute to hit everything however the meant target. We’re not like men, WHO area unit armed with what essentially amounts to a plaything fabricated from flesh. (Super not-fair, Mother Nature.) once squatting, a woman’s pee may even as simply spray just like the “mist” operate on a hose attachment as squirt straight down into the rest room. It may get on her garments. Her shoes. The floor. And it'll undoubtedly get on the rest room seat.
Also? Squatting is exercise. will we really need to combine exercise with excrement? And don’t even get Maine started on making an attempt to try and do variety 2 whereas squatting. I’m already feeling to a small degree stabby because it is.
Dear phobia-encumbered squatters, if you enter a rest room stall equipped with associate untarnished seat and you squat rather than sitting down, you simply entirely screwed everybody else’s probability at about to sit down and take an expensive, exercise-free pee thereon explicit bathroom for the remainder of the day, or a minimum of till the cleansing individuals come back and mop your nasty mess. (And by the means, i do know it’s “their job” to wash the bathrooms and everything, however does one actually need to form the task even a lot of loathly than it already is simply as a result of you’re afraid to take a seat on the stupid toilet? come back ON.) after you squat-pee—a.k.a. pee everywhere {the bathroom|the rest room|the bathroom} seat—everyone WHO uses that toilet once you sees your foul yellow droplets on the rest room seat and must either A) opt for another stall, B) clean your pee with a wad of bathroom paper or C) squat such as you did. All of those choices suck.
WHICH IS WHY we tend to simply ought to ALL comply with SIT.
And I mean all folks, as in, the whole feminine gender. This arrange solely works if we tend to agree all at once to try and do it as one—it’s like herd immunity for public bathrooms. And as an extra bonus, let’s additionally comply with keep our thighs and butt-cheeks clean, mkay ladies? If we will with confidence accept every other’s non-funkiness, it'll be that a lot of easier to “take the plunge,” therefore to talk. If we tend to all comply with sit down on the rest room seat as a result of, HELLO, that’s why it had been fictitious, we'll nevermore got to worry concerning sitting in somebody else’s pee or obtaining our own pee everywhere ourselves in an endeavor to avoid sitting in somebody else’s pee. everybody wins and no-one must bit pee. this can be female commonness at its finest.
So what does one say, Squatters? And please decide quickly. My child must pee.
P.S. It ought to go while not voice communication that my awing resolution to the rest room seat downside doesn't apply to porta-potties. In porta-potties, you ne'er sit down regardless of what, although it suggests that piss everywhere yourself.
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